Black Friday

I work retail security. I have ever since I was discharged out of the U.S Army. It’s not exactly the most rewarding job I’ve had but I get a level of accomplishment when I make a good apprehension on a large quantity of merchandise attempting to walk out of the department store. The hours suck, I’m working a lot of weekends and holidays because crime doesn’t take a day off. It’s a 13 billion dollar problem and I’m just one man trying to make a small dent in that figure.

The biggest complaint I have about working retail security is Black Friday. I can’t stand that day. And I don’t know if other countries have a Black Friday, but I think it should be banned. Only in America do people spend so much time standing in line for worthless crap. Only in America do people claim to be so thankful for all the shit in their house and lives and then set out 24 hours later to trample the shit out of each other over materialistic bullshit they could probably live without. I’m not against people coming out and spending money and buying cool trinkets and gadgets. And a lot of anti-Black Friday people want to shove the blame towards the big corporations by calling them greedy. Well, here’s how I look at it. I blame the consumer. If you schedule an appointment with someone for them to come to your door at midnight to give you $100 dollars and they call you the night before and tell you they’d like to re-schedule that appointment for 8pm that night instead, I’m sure you’d happily oblige them, right?

The main problem I have is the complaining. We had a problem with the television sets being sold. The department store I was working at during Black Friday only had a certain amount of tvs to be sold. There was a voucher system for those tvs that really didn’t work out. Tvs were sold to people who weren’t supposed to be buying, etc etc. It was chaos. Just as I had expected, though. When you cram that many people into one department area and have limited merchandise for everyone that wants one, that creates a problem. Black Friday sales never run smoothly. It’s not designed that way. It’s utter chaos.

A lot of the complaining I heard from people was just petty. It made me sick to my stomach mainly because I served a combat tour in Iraq and I know I still have brothers and sisters still in harm’s way in the middle east. I had one guy approach me and he was whining and crying about how long he’s been standing in line and all he wants is his tv. I wanted to smack the shit out of him. Truly, I did. What do these people expect? The store is over capacity. Everyone has been standing in line for hours. I’m supposed to have sympathy for people who stand in a line for hours (sometimes days on end) just to save a few bucks on some cheap piece of shit tv? I don’t think so.

One lady approached the store manager and told her “you better get me my Nook like the ad says. It would be in your best interest.” Are you fucking serious, lady?! It would be in your best interest? Who the hell do these people think they are? They’re spoiled, whiny, ungrateful Americans. That’s who they are. Black Friday brings out the worst in everyone. People bitching out sales associates, people cussing and crying about pointless crap…and it turns the associates into angry, bitter human beings. The whole thing is rigged to fail. Once one sales associate gets bitched out, they in turn, bitch out other associates and management that need help, thus upsetting the management because they feel disrespected by their own associates, which causes the management to fall apart. With customers going ape shit for no reason, the associates are now all upset, and nothing can run smoothly anymore.

What the fuck is the point in all of this? Are you that hard up for a tv that you have to show up at a retail store and embarrass yourself in front of thousands of people by throwing a child-like temper tantrum over what, a tv? Or a Nook? And what the fuck is a Nook anyway?! Someone please explain this horse shit madness to me. I recently bought a 42 inch Sanyo tv for $250 bucks. I went into the store like a normal human being at a reasonable hour and purchased the damn thing. You people who bought the $100 dollar tvs that they sold on Black Friday were literally scammed out of your money. Do you even know what a fucking Proscan is? It’s a knock off brand made by a big name Tv manufacturer like Toshiba or Sony specifically for Black Friday. It’s a junk tv. And your stupid ass stood in line for 8 hours, pitched a fucking fit over it all, and left the store with bullshit.

If you fucking morons wouldn’t line up at stores like idiots on Thanksgiving, we could all get a break with our families. Why can’t you Black Friday shoppers spend an entire day relaxing with your families or friends or just sitting on the couch doing nothing. Why do you have to always want shit? Why do you have to take away from others’ holiday because you want a cheap, piece of shit television? Why? I don’t understand.

Black Friday, for most, turns people into hateful, angry folks. For some, it’s a chance to get the things they want or need at discounted prices. For others, its fun to walk department store after department store to watch the chaos and utter confusing amongst a bunch of estranged individuals. And for those that stand in line, bitch out sales people, complain the whole time, yell and scream and punch others over Elmo dolls, try to express a little more gratitude with the crap you already have and learn to be less of an idiot. In America, we live pretty amazing lives. We are the most wasteful country on planet Earth and the wealthiest. I think we all can afford to be a lot less idiotic.


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